God has really taken me a long way. I remember in late August sitting in small group listen to Robyn talk about transparency and the importance of it. She said if you can not be transparent with your sins then that means you still identify yourself with that sin. By not being transparent you are robbing God of His glory. You are still allowing the devil to condemn you.

When she said that I was blown away. Each point just cut my heart deep. I was very very ashamed of my testimony and found myself crying at the end of small group. I didn't want to steal God of his glory but yet I was. I didn't want my name to be put in a bad light. People are going to see that little miss church girl Faith was actually a very scandalous girl on the inside.

So, I decided to just seek God and ask Him to cleanse me of his shame. I first reflect on Romans 8: 1-2¹Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus,^a]">[a] ²because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. I constantly meditated on this verse whenever I was feeling condemn and held tight to his promises. Jesus died on the cross for the same sin that I am ashamed of. It is finish! This is only Satan trying to hold this over me not the Lord, because he has forgiven me!

Through out my sophomore year the Lord has been pruning and giving me the spirit of boldness to testify of what the Lord has done for me. It's just amazing to see the Lords work because the previous blog is all God. Like I just felt a pull that people need to know what the Lord has set me free from. People need to know his Glory and really stop putting Faith Umoh in a good light. None of my achievements will ever compare to bondage that the Lord has broken me from and the eternal life that he has given me through His grace.

It's like the Lord has done a full 180 degree on my life. Like I truly have died to my old self, and honestly could not have gotten here without me really seeking the Lord for myself. By me receiving the Lords correction and begging for him to fix me! I really just want to encourage anyone who is ashamed of their testimony to really seek God and ask him to deliver you from the shame.

Revelation 12:11
1They overcame him
by the blood of the Lamb
and by the word of their testimony;


Luke 9:22-26
Then he said to them all: "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. ²⁴For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it. ²⁵What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit his very self? ²⁶If anyone is ashamed of me and my words, the Son of Man will be ashamed of him when he comes in his glory and in the glory of the Father and of the holy angels.

Galatians 1:10¹⁰Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.

~Faith

We are His adopted children. Quit seeking affection and belonging in other places. Jesus died on the cross years ago to take the scars we feel being made today. We are not alone. We are not subjected to the spirit of fear. He has declared freedom over our lives. To love and to be loved, only through His abounding, wonderful, mighty love that he graciously gives.

2 Timothy 1:7

-Stephanie

For the freedom to go home and sleep
instead of going home at any hour with the need to add checking my facebook as my daily routine of getting ready for bed even if it is 4 am!
For the freedom of more time
instead of trying to have self control over my time on facebook saying I would spend 15 min yet 15 mins would lead to 30 to 45 min till I know it I have been on facebook for like 2 hours!
For the freedom to stop worrying about what others thought of me
instead of constantly checking on facebook and seeing how many notifications I had recieved in the last hour or two. To see who was looking at my pictures, who comments on my pictures or liked my status.
For the freedom of pride
instead of always feeling elated and prideful when someone did leave me a comment or liked my picture, or put me with them as their profile picture...literally when anyone would put me in a good light
For the freedom of shedding this "I can be a good girl on the outside...but then be my little bad girl on the inside" when I would message multiple guys on the inside. Never getting to close, but always being the master of the game that they thought they playing on me. Yet, knowing that the joke was always on them. Or was it?
For the freedom of stalking
instead of stalking peoples life and goals before I even met them! Tracking people down, seeing who went where and did what with whom. Getting upset when I see a girl comment on my ex's page and what not
For the freedom of insecurity
instead of roaming to facebook aimlessly and seeing how everyone's life appread to be fun and amazing and happy. Or seeing my friends going out with each other wondering why I was not invited. Or why is she on your profile picture and not I? Why my ex is with her and not me?
For the freedom of transparency
instead of putting on this beautiful persona that my life is sooooooo good. And now it is even better that I have found Jesus. Yet, never able to reveal the ugliness of my life. The break ups , the heart breaks, and all the sins that I struggled because I feared of what people thought of me. Or didn't want people to stop thinking of me Faith Umoh as a good light. I was afraid that I could no longer control what people thought of me after I was transparent.

Why did I take a break from Facebook....
simply to truly find my identity in Christ and not my Facebook

~Faith