It’s almost time for me to go home for a two week break. I have been blessed in so many ways to be here in Gainesville this summer. With this journey that the Lord has called me upon to seek him, and all the wonderful people who have impacted me I couldn’t have imagined my summer spent anyway else. But I haven’t gone home for a single day all summer, and I don’t know if it’s the anxiety of almost being there but I really miss it.
If there was ever a love I knew I understood, it was love for my family. I love them unconditionally. I was reminded how strong a feeling that can be when I went to Haiti and met my cousins for the first time. As cheesy as it sounds I was all nervous to meet them, mainly because my Creole is far from being on point, but after spending one afternoon with them I knew I loved them, and I miss them to this day!
As for my immediate family, I’m so used to seeing them everyday its weird even after being up here for a year and a half. My dad works out the country so in the house my family of 5 [6 if you count tazzy boo] has almost broke in half. Nevertheless I am very close with my two older brothers, we NEVER [and I’m not exaggerating] fight, and I love and appreciate my parents now more than ever.
I don’t think I express my love to others as much as I should. Should I use words, actions, gifts, silence, an open heart, or willing ears? How do you truly express love?Along with this question, everyday I’m trying to wrap my mind around the idea of how much the Father loves me. I’m in awe of his love more and more every day, no matter how insignificant or broken I believe I am God thinks I’m beautiful! The king is enthralled by your beauty; honor him, for he is your lord. Psalm 45:11
He sees me not as I am but as the person I become in His beauty. I am only beautiful because He is. I love because He loved me first. So in that case I don’t believe the heart grows fonder with absence. Jesus delights when we give our all to him, so why would I not want to please the one who loves me so much to die for my sins, to die not for my own happiness, but the ability to live a life with him, TRUE happiness. He said to seek him and He shall be found. So I’m giving it all up to understand love in God’s eyes. “..And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ.” Ephesians 3:17-18
-Stephanie
